Exhausted

I feel extremely exhausted man.
I feel so totally tied up with studies.
Man, how cool would life be if I can just be totally rich and successful without going through the pains of studying.
I've been feeling pressure is with me and it won't get off my back. It's sticking to me like some gum stuck in somebody's hair.
It's extremely sick to think about homework, not to mention a lot of homework, meeting up with parents' and teachers' expectations.
And a lot more.
I guess my foundation and everything isn't that strong.
I mean, I have a poor sense of organization and responsibility (?)
That's why I guess I'm having difficulties now.
I mean no matter how hard I try and everything, I'd be disturbed.
I don't know why and how, but I feel that I am disturbed.
I also don't get the point why do I keep on ranting and complaining about this.
While I sort of feel that it's also my fault, that I'm not persevering much.
Can somebody make me grow up?
And point out my mistakes, open my eyes and make me face up to reality.
That I need to study and work hard for me to be able to reach my dreams
I don't need pressure, I just need some push. And perhaps a tight(?) slap, I really need to stop daydreaming.
George damn it, I need to change pronto.
I need more inspiration.
Lol, not that I am saying Andre and my friends aren't inspiring me.
They are. They've been the reason why I've been waking up and looking forward for every school day.
I'm being all enthusiastic to go to school, cause I want to see them and not really "learning about new stuffs".

Oh well, sometimes Andre would ask me to do my homework and all.
Frankly, I've been doing my homework cause he asked me too.
I really don't get me.
And sometimes, in the middle of my daydreaming, there would be this commercial break kind of thing inside my brain.
Asking me, what am I doing, instead of making my parents proud and everything.
One word- Shit.
I'm against myself. I'm on the edge of breaking down man. (duh, exaggerating)
I hope I'd change.
As soon as possible... NOW.
I need to focus.
People, friends, I need you to inspire me more.
Lol.
Baby.. inspire me more.
teehee.

you know you love me
Angelika